Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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