so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
she smelled like a LAN party
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize