Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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