Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
