Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
