Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
why do cheetos always look like penises
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize
