Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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