Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
