i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
