I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again