We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize