The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
