Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
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He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I'm just crazy horny about you
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I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?