dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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