You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
