IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
She's the barista slut.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Randomize
