What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize