she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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