i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize
