why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
