I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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