You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Randomize
