I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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