I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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