i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
