Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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