I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize