And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
