i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Randomize
