I wish I could punch you in the face.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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