its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I will pee on everything he values.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
