Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
