he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
