i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
