trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
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