I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
