She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
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