just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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