Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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