if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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