and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
