There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Randomize
