why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
