when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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