Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
