Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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