Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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