I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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