why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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