FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
