uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
The air was thick with penises
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
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